It is okay to follow a trend, but don’t forget your own unique self
When you press rewind on your tape recording of life, do you notice how you may have branched off and explored another faculty of yourself only to later realize it was possibly not the best decision?
There is nothing wrong with this and, in fact, I think it is great. Too many of my clients get down on themselves for possibly taking a turn in life that didn’t provide them with the ROI that they had hoped for. My suggestion is to acknowledge it and move on. As we grow older in age, we have the advantage of seeing our trends and patterns of behaviour and realize a repeated behaviour has provided us with one of two things: abundance or lack. Rarely is it neutral.
By the way, may I take this opportunity to say…I am so sick of the word ‘pivot’. Is this not the most annoying COVID-19 word? How many times have you read or heard someone say, “We had to pivot” or, “You need to pivot”? Okay, I feel better now. 😊
So, think about this a bit more, are you a trend follower or a creator of your life? Are you one to do your own thing, or are you highly influenced by social media and society? Many of us have wasted a lot of time and money doing something we thought we would like just because a friend was doing it, or we simply believed it would make us happier or more successful, only to later discover we dislike it.
Can you share with me a time or an idea you followed that you later discovered was NOT true to who you are? Please tell me about it. I think we need to laugh at ourselves more often when we discover these things and more importantly tell someone or discuss it more openly. If you have discovered something deeper about yourself, chances are someone else has as well.
Society is constantly telling us what we should and shouldn’t be doing or what not to do. Goodness knows this is so true in the diet world. Billboards and headlines abound with the superfood you simply must have on your plate every day, or the best morning routine, or how to get the best night sleep.
Honestly, it is exhausting. The irony of it all is, although this great information, we are becoming even more sick, fat, and exhausted because of information overload in a world where most are already overwhelmed in just doing life.
“Most of us stop before we start, and we do this because of fear.”
I am here to tell you there is nothing more important in life than mindset. It is so much more important than the green smoothie, exercise, or your meditation practice. Yes, I just said it. You do not need to meditate 20 minutes a day to be Zen, happy and successful.
Did you notice I just went full circle? I am back at the reason why I began to write this post today. I see so many of us (including me) feel pressured to DO MORE, and often feel guilty we are not doing more, when really, we need to do less. By doing less I don’t mean watch more TV, scroll through social media, or smoke a joint. I mean just slow down a little, sit with your thoughts, talk more to your friends or partner, and figure out what you really want out of life. I think we are too busy trying to do too much rather than thinking, “What do I want out of this life?”
The second part of this exercise is to share what you want with others, especially the people closest to you, because if they truly support you, they will not only act as an accountability partner, but also provide you with the energy and enthusiasm to believe in yourself (this can also be a coach, therapist, prayer group, etc.). You see…the belief in yourself is usually the thing that is holding you back. Most of us stop before we start, and we do this because of fear. However, once you learn the belief you hold of yourself is only in your own little world (in other words, it is not a belief that others’ have of you), that fear melts away.
If you are curious whether this belief is the truth or whether it is something only in your head, then take some action. Get out a pen and paper and start writing out the question, “Is this true of myself? Is this actually true?” You will soon see it is NOT true, as there is no valid reason for it to be true.
I am excited to see what realizations you unveil about yourself. As a side benefit, those who believe in you will see you become lighter, stronger, and happier because you will be discovering your authentic self and consequently, stop sleep walking through life. Life is so short! Do your best to be more a part of this wonderful world.
Looking forward to your comments and questions on this topic.
P.S. Remember to send questions to Is This Normal? tab of my website. It is great to get people engaged and grow a community of individuals that want more out of life. Therefore, be curious! There is no such thing as a bad question.
‘til the next post, xoxo