My Life Sucks!
These are the words that are resounding around my house…coming from the mouths of my 18- and 20-year-old children. And my response?
It sure does.
With the third wave of lockdowns just coming to surface, I am really starting to feel for these kids. They have entered a social time capsule of sorts. It seems they are trying to continue with studying online, but they are missing out on so much social connection. I mean, think back to your university years. I lived for beer bashes and hanging out having coffee with my friends at University Centre, doing workouts at the gym, or hanging out in Dafoe Library pretending to study.
Not to mention the difficulty of maintaining any sort of job! You are working. Oh, wait a minute, you are not working. You are working again…sorry, that was a dream, you are not allowed to work. Oh, and by the way, we are not connecting with Gramma for Mother’s Day, even though you haven’t seen her for XX months. Let’s just go to the cabin…Sorry, you can’t enter Ontario.
So now that I just added to your already depressed state, let’s try to turn things around a bit and cheer you up. Let’s talk about Prime Minister Trudeau. J JK, that was a joke.
Are you smiling now?
WHAT TO DO?
What to do? Well, in the past, I have likely talked to you about the power of the mind. Your thoughts really do create your reality. Your thoughts program your cell biology. A toxic thought can change the structure of our DNA. That is amazing when you think of it. A negative thought, a stressful thought, can literally misfold proteins that structure your DNA.
Knowing that we cannot change what our environment dishes out to us, how do we protect ourselves from harm? How do we stay emotionally and physically healthy when life throws us curve balls all the time?
The answer to change our perception of what is harming to us and what is not. We have all done it. When we start thinking of what ‘may be’ – what ‘could be’ then we are going to go into this regurgitated thinking process and stay stuck there – as our DNA becomes more and more misfolded. We tend to ruminate on the ‘what ifs’ and get stuck in our heads…thinking, thinking, thinking.
What is the definition of regurgitation? Informally speaking, it is what cows do when they chew on grass. They chew, swallow, and regurgitate it back up only to chew on it a bit more. Disgusting … but very effective. That is…if you are a cow.
You are not a cow.
You are a human being who wants life to be perfect – and it is not.
You are a human being who wants life to be perfect – and it is not. And with Covid eventually becoming less threatening and something we will at some time speak of as, ‘Remember when?’ and telling your kids or grandkids what it was all about, you will realize you did make it through. There is another side. This is temporary and patience is a virtue.
Resiliency is something we all need to strive towards, because when Covid becomes an idea of the past, there will be something else on the horizon that threatens us in some way.
So back to the goal of changing one’s perception of what a stressful event is and is not. The best way to do this is to try to reframe the thought. See it in a different light. So, with the example of Covid, you might think of it as, ‘I don’t know why I am challenged as I am right now at this stage of my life, but I trust that it will make me a better person in the end’. Using words such as, “I am CHOOSING to look at these hardships in this way because I am CHOOSING to keep my mind and body healthy”. I am CHOOSING to think this is happening for a reason and I am surrendering to the fact that I can’t control it (lack of socialization, lack of travel, lack of human touch or facial expression) and I am CHOOSING to think of something else that brings me happiness.’
When we regain the idea of having a choice, we replenish that locus of control and that feels good!! Now the healthy hormones are secreted and your biology changes.
Stay healthy in mind and body. You can’t run or eat organic foods your way out of a toxic mindset, nor can you ‘smile’ or quote positive affirmations your way out of eating crappy food.
Do your best to regain balance in all aspects of your life and meanwhile…
Yes, your life sucks (right now J).
“You can’t run or eat organic foods your way out of a toxic mindset, nor can you ‘smile’ or quote positive affirmations your way out of eating crappy food.”