Blog
Luella’s pened thoughts on topics relating to emotional fullfillment and personal achievement. New posts weekly.
You Can’t Talk Your Spouse out of an Addiction
If your partner is struggling with drug abuse, normally just talking to him or her isn't enough. I see it over and over that partners seem to live on 'hope' for so long before finally being able to draw a line in the sand. Normally separation unfolds. Whether or not...
Having Difficult Conversations are Necessary in a Relationship
Many of us feel the need to play it safe. We don't want to 'rock the boat'. The problem with this is that your relationship stays stagnant. I would say that 80% of couples come to me stating they have difficulty communicating to one another. Stepping into safety by...
How to Attract a Partner Who Wants What You Want
At some time in our lives, we have gone through the process of trying to figure out why this person broke up with us. We go through the last few interactions with this person (if it was a new relationship), and question if it was something you said, or didn’t say, did...
Being Judgemental of Yourself and Others
Do you sometimes catch yourself saying words like ‘ I don’t get why he is so ….’ Or ‘ if he could only be …’. If you do, stop yourself right there and ask yourself these questions instead: What could I have said instead to not have made our discussion go south? What...
Discovering the root cause of a physical or mental dis-ease is always the first step.
From there on we look forward, we don’t stay fixed on the past. For example, in the applied science of engineering, we use knowledge to design, analyze, and construct for practical purposes. When the titanic sank to the bottom of the sea, the engineers didn’t sit...
How Competitiveness Sucks Joy From Relationships
When we think about the word competitive or describe someone as competitive in nature, I doubt that the first thing you think of is how this can be a red flag in regards to relationships. However, it is quite common for me to have couples coming to see me with...
When Your Partner Craves a Substance More Than He Craves You
If you are someone who has been in a committed relationship in which your partner is struggling with substance abuse or misuse, you will certainly relate to the words on this page. No one wants to compete for attention with a drug or behaviour, whether it be cocaine,...
Resentment
Build-up of resentment is extremely common in any relationship. The problem is that it will never go away unless you bring your attention to it. You need to get rid of it before it creates a wall between you and your partner. If years go by with built-up resentment,...
Why You Cannot Push Past Perpetual Problems in Relationships
Most couples in a long-term relationship will be able to list at least one perpetual problem to which they seem to never find a solution. There is usually an ‘underlying current’ streaming below the relationship that is the basis for the conflicts. For example, one...